OSCAR PREDICTIONS, time-sensitive content.
SEATTLE – 2008.02.23
Oscarsssssssssss:
Blargy blarg. Blarg. BLARG.
Tomorrow is oscars, I watched the stupid movies. Actually they were good, and not stupid. Dont expect me to say anything inspired about the five movies, I’m just going to ramble and recommend.
There will be blood: “I eat YOUR milkshake.”
So what’s his face day lewis here is crazy. His voice sounds like oil, and you’re basically mesmerized throughout the entire relentlesssss movie. Radiohead guitarist’s score is pretty key to establishing the constant tension that kind of beats you over and over for three hours. I don’t know. Usually when you see movies, as you stand up through the time you get to the car etc you kind of debrief with your friends, recount jokes or shocking moments, you know? After this one, everyone was just kind of silent. For at least twenty minutes, though everyone would sheepishly laugh like once, “ha..” awkwardly. Yea, it was a pretty overwhelming movie, but definitely a must see. I feel like day lewis was on screen for at least 95% of the movie, so it really is just about this character, which is fine because he’s unlike anything else I really remember seeing in a movie recently.
Judgement: As far as best of the five? Possibly. Most unique, definitely. Not my favorite, personally, but everyone EVERYONE should probably watch it.
Juno:
First one I saw, though i definitely experienced the backlash that is inherint when anything goes all “garden state soundtrack” on me. I think it was hard at first to get in to that stripper’s dialogue style for the juno character at first, and the hamburger phone etc, but I dont discount the movie based on those things. I was really in to it by the time it was a third of the way in, liking all the characters, and happy that things like Michael Bluth coming on to juno happened, to keep things shaken up. George michael is of course great, and Elektra is another one that you assume will be movie stereotype but then goes and looks like actually a pretty good future mother (in the shopping mall scene). So yea, I did end up liking this one a lot during, but haven’t really found myself thinking about it too much after seeing it.
Judgement: You dont need to see it in theater, and it wont/doesn’t deserve to win. But its nice enough to torrent and put on for an ok (but not awesome) night. Obviously though, since an awesome night requires instead either booze plus loud bass frequencies and or seeing andrew wk live.
Michael Clayton:
No one watches this one for some reason, I think because its color palette is all blue black and white, which makes people think of the backstreet boys. and it has george clooney, of Batman and Robin fame. But fuck that movie, and fuck george clooney for being in it. actually, I love george clooney, and i am old enough to separate him from the piece of shit that batman and robin was. i just dont get why warner brothers were like, “you know what the batman franchise needs? fucking arnold schwarzeneganagher and nipples on batmans costume.” and then the other dumbass executive says, “great idea, lets also have his boots shoot out ice skates, and show a close up of his ass when he’s getting pumped up to fight bad guys.” Michael clayton is kind of like a john grisham novel, and is just really well done. It didn’t impact my life, but i enjoyed the two hours i spent watching it.
Judgement: Fuck batman and robin, the movie, not the characters (who rule). Michael clayton wont win any awards.
No Country For Old Men:
So everywhere on the internet I go, I hear that this is going to win. Ok, whatever, it was good. Bardem’s bad guy is a pretty good killer. He totally stole that coin flip for life or death thing from Two Face though. But fuck Batman Forever, that movie sucks. Speaking of Tommy Lee Jones, he’s also in this movie, and he’s pretty cool. Does someone want to explain to me his speech at the end of the movie? I feel like if I thought about it for a while, I’d understand the point of the movie in this speech, but I dont really want to think about it too hard. Josh Brolin rules, he’s hilarious AND badass. I think all the parts with badasskiller hunting awesomeBrolin are soooo great, but am I the only one who doesn’t really understand why those parts add up to a movie that deserves best picture? Yes its really like stupidly incredibly well made. The scenery is expansive, and shit that defies movie convention given the plot, always happens, which is amazing and unexpected, and then you remember its the coen brothers, but wait does that then make those unconventional things Expected? I’m not sure.
Judgement: It’s good, but I’m not killing myself due to its awesomeness.
Atonement:
Um, AWESOME. My favorite genre in the movies are war-set epic romantic tragedies. Based on the trailer, I was all ready for the next english patient. Atonement managed to deliver everything I needed from that expectation while refusing to fall in to all the war-set epic romantic tragedy cliches. That’s a nice compliment, even though I love those cliches and find nothing wrong with them usually, but it does add up to a pretty fresh movie. There’s this amazing five-minute tracking shot in the middle of the movie, that tries to express that enormity of the british army that’s withdrawing from Dunkirk, heading up the beach, showing horses being executed (how do they get them to fall down like that?), going up to the village above, showing a choir singing (with their voices in tune with the sweeping score), and then to a bar, with the three main dudes walking in and out of the scene. It is completely mind blowing, like a couple of those scenes in Children of Men. People say, yea its a cool shot, but it takes you out of the movie instead of really expressing the size of the retreat that is intended. I say fuck that, I give you +150 points because the shot is soooo awesomely choreagraphed that you should shut the hell up. This is the most beautifully filmed of the five movies. Kira Knightley’s green dress? and the hot hot sex scene in the parlour room? Stupid little blonde haired, never change her haircut in 80 years, girl, How DARE you ruin these two folks lives! I dont forgive you. The end of this movie? F’ing unexpected as all hell.
Judgement: This one was my favorite. I wish it would win. Why isn’t it going to win by the way?
“I’M FINISHED.”